The Dome.

And S slept.
And he awoke.

He awoke to find a void. A large white landscape with no features at all. It was like he had reached the edge of horizon and now it seemed that it extended forever.
He walked a bit and nothing changed. All was white but not the kind that hurts your eyes. The white that soothes the soul. Yet he panicked for this void had no features. It was plain and peaceful. Pristine and quite and he could not stand it. He opened his mouth to scream. He could not hear his voice. The terror of this place seized him, this he realized, must be hell. There was no devil required. This place brought out the devil in you.

Suddenly, things began to materialize, shapes began to form and he was too astounded and dumbstruck to realize what was happening. The whole landscape was shifting and changing. It was as if the creator made him experience the most ghastly form of horror and then takes it away to bring out something even more surreal. He could not bear it any more. He closed his eyes, and shut his ears. Yet he wondered, there is no sound, why should I shut my ears. The light is not so bright, yet why do I feel like closing my eyes ?

After what seemed like eternity, for this place had no concept of time - No factor by which one could say if a minute had passed or an hour or an year, he opened his eyes and what he saw was a scene of utter amazement. The background was still the same. There was a eternal white luminescence that radiated amibently. But now when he looked up, he was a large dome, white in colour intricately carved. So intricate that one had to squint his eyes to see the microcosm of design. At a passing glance, the dome would look bare and plain white. Staring at it for a second mad him realized that it was made of infinitely grainy designs that were so intricate that it was nothing like he had ever seen. Another horror gripped him, one of beauty that one only gets to see and realize at the end of his life. Surely, this must be a thing carved for the Gods, no mortal could ever make this. More so, no mortal should ever lay his eyes on this.

Yet, the naive S, so engrossed by looking up that he forgot to look down at the plane - and when he did, he saw that he was not alone. Inside the dome were a billion people. All like him except that they did not seem to mind the dome. It was like they were used to the dome and have come to acknowledge its presence. The realization dawned upon him - every single person - born or dead was present inside this dome. The amazement was that even though it had so many people, the place looked quite empty. The white background percolated and he felt that the dome was quite spacious and roomy, even for the entire population that ever was.

He then heard voices in his head. He could not tell if this was him or someone else talking to him. However, the message were clear. He had to go and approach every single person there and talk to them. Only one of those billion people would acknowledge his presence. The one that did so however, was the one with whom he was to be with forever. He was thrilled and frightened. Not knowing what to expect. Yet, the prize was so important to him that he had to try. Whatever effort it took, would seem worth it.

He went from person to person. Not one could hear his voice. Not even one of them could see him. He tried shaking them, touching them but his hands went through their bodies, they became translucent when he passed his hand and yet when he did remove his hand, they seemed as real as his limbs looked to him. They were all mannequins talking to each other in their own language. Their own gestures. Their expressions were weird. They talked to one another but he could not hear them. They talked very less to each other. But they were very expressive. In this strange world to which he was a mere apparition, everyone understood each other perfectly, there was no need to talk one word extra. For everyone conveyed their thoughts with perfect precision. Their expressions were not misunderstood. They had a calm on their face. It was a calm that mocked him. For he was not one of them. They seemed to know that and yet did not make even the slightest of indication to him that they knew.

He moved along trying to talk from person to person. A billion people in all. The numbers did not matter, for he had forever. The mannequins would continue talking to each other. It was a flawless, perceptual system. The kind that God would create on his playground for his amusement. It seemed like he was the centre of that amusement. He felt people laughing. Of course, he could not actually see them do that. But then could feel eyes mocking him in his futile attempt. Trying to persuade him not to try any further. Every single person seemed to be impervious to him. They all seemed to be laughing at him now. He could not take it any more. He looked up the dome to find some solace and saw that it was now a perfect mirror and reflected everything that was happening below. Such was the beauty of this place that he could not escape it, this place would consume him and break him. Make him one of their own. He could no close his eyes, there were images in his head about them mocking him. He had nothing to do. He was dead and alive at the same time. The feeling was that he was dead. Yet, the pain showed him that he was alive.

In one final desperate attempt, hoping that this would be like the movies, where one only succeeds when he gives up all hope, he saw the most beautiful mannequin he could find and started walking towards it. In his feeble mind, he was desperately hoping that this would be the moment that he was waiting for. With this mannequin, he would be released from this hell-hole. He approached the mannequin and the its eyes moved, and her eye brows arched up. It was the feeling that one sees when someone is surprised but also pleasantly surprised. The elation in his mind was ecstatic. He was felt like his whole life was going to be re-lived and he had found purpose to everything. He thought this was the moment of Nirvana, that everyone speaks about. With trepidation and a excitement he could barely conceal, he went towards his mannequin.

When he reached close enough, his hopes crashed and he felt like he was being sucked into this void that he could never come out of. He felt like there would never be happiness again in his life. The mannequin was not responding to him, but to someone else behind him. Yet he could not give up, the chance of victory and what he would achieve with it was too astounding for him to give up. He went closer and closer. Finally, with all the courage and determination he could muster, he touched her body..

His hand slipped right through. There was no resistance. It was like a silky texture that he could not get his hands on. He tried again and again. Hoping that maybe if he tried hard enough, it would become real. He did not know which struck him first, his realization that he was alone or the fact that he should stop trying to make her real. He had no other option but to collapse, his dreams shattered. The worst part of that was that he was taken to the pinnacle of happiness. The feeling that you have found what you have been looking for and then was brought down crashing to the featureless ground. He now wished that he could just have stayed in that pinnacle. He wished that he had had the courage to not find out if she was real. But instead, to just feel happy that he had found her and that he did not wish to prove himself right or wrong. But now he could do nothing. The fear of loneliness and and sadness engulfed him at once. He wanted to kill himself but did not know how. He did not know if he was dead or alive but he wished to kill himself.

He did the only thing he could do. He screamed and he shouted. This time however, he could hear his voice. Harsh and clear, his voice echoed through the magnitude of the dome and reverberated. He screamed and screamed. He screamed till he could scream no more and yet wished that he could scream some more.

With him losing his voice box and not knowing what to do, he calmed down. It was then that this realization hit him. He realized the true purpose of this place. He realized that he must not try to be different but one of them. S now, regained his confidence. Like a man whose path looks clear despite the fog, he knew what he had to do. He closed his eyes and shut down all his senses. He closed himself and for once he felt oddly at peace - quite and calm. Those laughs had disappeared. It was like they knew that he has realized what he had realized. He spoke to the voice that had commanded. Not with pity or in a tone that asked a favor, but with a clear and calm voice ..

"I want to be one of them .. I want to be one of them .. "

And surely enough, his wish was being granted. He could see himself fade away from the presence of himself into entering the world of translucency. His body was changing and his shape was becoming more vague. It was like he was made of smoke or something of that kind - a kind of ether. He felt happy and satisfied. Knowing that although he wont find the one for him, he would not be alone. He would be with the rest of them, under the dome - living in their world, talking in their language.

He looked around him and that is when he was what he did not want to see. The prettiest girl he ever saw, the one with the most beautiful smile was approaching him. He knew at that instant that she was the one he was looking for. He knew it and did not have to reason with it for it is stupid to question something that the mind knows intrinsically. She ran towards him and he ran towards her. Hoping that it was not too late. He could feel his body become more and more weightless for he knew that he was becoming one of them. He ran towards he, feeling truly happy and satisfied - thinking of the ups and downs in his emotion and how it had all been worth it, given how he felt right now.

He reached near her and she reached out to him. She raised her hand so that she could feel the skin of his body, the smooth lines of his face and gentle eyes that now portrayed only love. She reached for him and her hand went right through him. She tried and tried again. Hoping that her repeated attempts would nullify the previous ones. S screamed and tried desperately to reach out her. He could not. He could now hear conversation and talking. He felt himself talking to the other mannequins in the same precise manner that they had spoken to one another. S had no option but to try desperately. He knew what the girl felt like but could not convey anything to her. He saw the sadness in her eyes and wanted to tell her that it would be ok. But he could for two reason - for one, he could not communicate and if for some strange reason, the law of the dome permitted him to talk to her only for a second, he knew that he would have to lie to her if he had to calm her down saying that everything would be ok.

S was now one of them. The girl made one last attempt to reach out to him but could not do so. Neither could S. He turned around and so did she. They both would not meet again. He had a feeling that they would not. S started talking to the people who were just like him. They recognized his presence and he made conversation with them. S felt satisfied that he could at least talk to them. Deep down however, he knew that he was really really sad and nothing he could do would change that.

He sighed and moved away. And continued to talk to them. But the sadness never went away. It felt like they were still mocking him. He felt that they would always continue to mock him. S had no comfort. The dome was now pure white once again. The intricacies had vanished. S knew the mocking would never stop. Neither would the sadness.

He sighed and he moved on. Talking to the next person in the strange language and expression that he had now acquired.

He sighed and moved on.

On Marriage.

The post below is satire and supposed to funny. But there is an underlying truth to it and meaning that I want to bring out without offending people. Hope you like it.

With over 4 years of preparation drawing to its fitting conclusion, it was quite a sight to see my sister walk into uncharted territory. I got to witness the great Indian wedding from one of the best perspectives possible to observe it from. Perhaps, a better perspective could only achieved by actually getting married and despite some of my relatives pledging to find me a “good girl” looking at my supposed good looks, I am quite content with the role of an observer for now.

Either ways, on with the show .. If you ever thought that our society was based equality of both the genders, try seeing the difference you would have between being on the girls side as opposed to the guys side. One, seems like a stroll in the park while the other seems like a walk to gates of hell where the slightest slip would send one lashing to the fires of hell. Yes, perhaps I do not paint an accurate picture and exaggerate but being on the receiving end of it does make it seem like that.

First off, the brides and the bridegrooms have to face a double edged knife. No work could ever be penned on to them. Conveniently the pressure that one has to endure to go through such an important moment is enough for it to be stated as an excuse. Emotional pressure is too much as such and hence physical work must not be assigned to them. Indeed, all close to the bridegroom and especially the bride would unanimously agree that almost no blame can be put on the bride, and one must take one of the team to ensure the bride is in her best spirits for the wedding.

Given the strong statement made above it would seem that one should gladly trade places with them. However, having looked at one wedding ceremony and 3 receptions, there are things that the bride and bridegroom have going against them. First and foremost, if you are not a photogenic person, getting married is certainly not for you. The amount of photos taken in a Indian wedding would easily total greater than all the photos that ever existed of you in your life. In fact, I would theorize that the photo business in India does business and blooms only because of Indian weddings. God, the number of photos that are taken are absolutely astounding. Every single guest wants a wedding picture with the bride and the groom. Its almost like they would be summoned to court to prove that they did attend the wedding and the photo was their primary source of evidence. Apart from that, every single move that the to-wed couple make should be photographed. Groom feeding bride ? Take a photo .. Groom and bride smiling ? Take a photo .. Groom and bride receiving people ? Take a photo .. Groom and bride sneezing ? Take a photo .. Groom and bride saying “bless you” after sneezing ? Take a photo .. you see where I am going with this right ? Yet, to top this all, there is videographer present right there. You would think that with the number of photos taken, there would be no need to take a video but I assume that it would make better evidence in the hypothetical courtroom that all the invitees are summoned to, to prove their attendance. Weddings could be aptly termed  as “Hey, feel like a celebrity who is being stalked by paparazzi for one day”

That being said, photos been taken of you is ok. Forcing yourself to smile for each and every photo is a torture of another level. If you think you could not smile in some of the photos, you are mistaken. The photographer present there is eager to show that he could easily transition into shooting in bollywood or Hollywood: He wouldn't not make you not smile on even a single photo. My poor sister and her husband had to go through a one hour photo session so that the album could come out well. This was after the reception which last over 4 hours and they had to meet each of the 1000 guests that had turned up for the day. The photographer took a bit to many photos from many different angles and positions. I was pretty sure that at one point he was making them do some yoga postures (this might not be true but it certainly did seem like that to the innocent bystanders who were waiting for them to get done so that they could have dinner after working like dogs to make sure the reception went well.)

Moving on, it is said that humans, through hundreds of thousand of years of evolution have developed an innate ability to detect and recognize faces. This ability however stands the test of time at a wedding. A million relatives meeting you in a short span of time and it is your bounded duty to remember them and say a line or two that is relevant and specific to them. If you ever think that you can get away from a situation where you don't remember someone, you clearly haven't been where I have been. Most relatives ask the simple question of  “do you know who I am” and you cant just say yes and walk away, it makes things very awkward (trust me, I tried it). The only appropriate response is to say who they are or engage in small talk that proves to them that you know who they are. If that sounds simple, its because there is more to it: There are a certain percentage of your relatives who you have only met once before in your life. That too when you were really small. So they understand that you don't know who they are. Yet, they hope that you by some miracle know who they are. If you don't, then they are cool with that. However, if you do the same with relatives that you have met anytime in the last 10 years, then you better know who they are, who their sons and daughters are, their ages, their blood groups and even their favorite color and number.  It is best to have an older person beside you who can get you out of such sticky situations. For me, its my mother. Jai Mata Di. :)

All that being said, weddings are a fun event where you get to see all of your family and spend quality time with them. That coupled with the good food that you get to eat does do justice to the whole event. Indian wedding are one of the pillars of our society and even though you can love or hate it, there is not denying that weddings do mark a big event. It is something that would be attended by even your great grandfather's cousins' grandson. Such is India, such is the pride (or, price) of being Indian.

Religious Tolerance

What does religious tolerance mean to us ? Why should one take time understanding it ? Here, I feebly try to explain what I mean by it:

We are all entitled to our own religious stance - whichever religion that we choose to be a part of and associate us with. In fact, going by the trend these days, there are a lot of people who are not religious, but believe in spirituality, and there are atheists, who are not even spiritual. What is important to note and what is also given in the Bhagavat Gita, is that the relationship that one has with God is personal and something that is unique to that person. What we as humans, can do is to accept this difference and lead more tolerant lives.

Religion is something that has been coming down for generations and almost every religion in the world has got its set of holy texts which claim  to be either the voice of God Himself, or the voice of the messenger of God. The difference is a fine one and ultimately means the same thing. Claiming that these books are absolute truth (the voice of God himself). Each one in his own religion must undertake a study at some point in his life to go over them in its native form and form his own opinion about them.

The problem I think today is that most of us only hear opinions about religion from Godmen of that particular religion and although we must at no point argue that their teachings are wrong. They too are opinions that are based from reading spiritual texts. The same texts that are available to each and everyone of us in that religion. The whole point of a religion is that we should agree to one another's view atleast inside that religion.

That being said, when someone doesn't stick to the pattern followed by everyone else in that religion, we tend to push that person towards what the majority does. Yet, if we are tolerant, we will respect that person's stand and let them be. The main thing to note that although both of you are following the same religion, and having the same God, same holy scriptures, yet, your relationship is different. That is in itself, is the basic teaching of any religion.

“There is no right or wrong, all there is, is the fact that we agree to disagree”

Now to the more touchy topic of respecting other religions. When someone is firmly rooted in ones own religion, other religions might seem irrational, inconclusive and even unacceptable. Yet, almost every religion has some basic underlying concepts that are universal in nature. These principals like: being kind, generous, not hurting others and so on as present in every religion. What we must see is that even though we might not accept other religions, we must respect them because all of them are a tool to attain religious well being and to live a more peaceful life on this earth.

I think that although religious leaders should be allowed to preach their teachings and religion, they should not claim that their religion or method of living is superior to others. It might be more appealing and might have more acceptance but that does not mean that everyone else is wrong. What religion to should be, is a set of concepts that if, you agree by, then you are following that religion. To at any point, state the such and such religion is not correct or against you is a sign of a person not being tolerant or enlightened enough to accept the different stance because ultimately, religion is personal and your relationship with God is also just as unique as someone else's.

Ultimately, what I would request everyone to do is to support each other through the time when each one of us are finding out who we are, what it means to be spiritual, or to follow a particular religion. It is unwise to push someone on any side of the field. What we can do, is to offer our opinion and let that person decide. I wish to everyone reading this article that they try to be more tolerant.

So, next time, when you find yourself in a tense situation where you have to interact with some who doesn't share your belief system and probably is lashing out at yours … take a step back, smile, remember the greater good of all religions is the same and merely agree to disagree.

God Bless.  

Born on this day.

Written on the night of my birthday: June 24th, 2012.

Life has bigger plans for all of us. You don't have to believe in this yourself but then  events, people and situations might convince you to believe so.

Loss is irreplaceable. That is the beauty of loss. Yet, we all are stagnant in it. But we shouldn't, we should be changing not being stuck on our losses. Loss is tied closely to pain and that is something we cannot avoid. My advice on dealing with loss is to avoid the pain and ignore it by keeping yourself busy with other thoughts. To not think about it at all. It is then, through cracks in the compartmentalization process that the really important parts seep out. The part that makes you grow and not the one that makes you want to cry. I have no idea if this is the best way to go about it. It is not that everyone displays their personal results while going through loss. But, this being the way that i have seen people dealing with it has almost always worked. Perhaps the magnitude of the loss also matters. Perhaps if one encounter a loss so great that nothing can be done about it, one can not keep it at the back of his mind, and then the best way to deal with it would be head on. But what if in this head on collision, one gets scarred permanently ? It is something that we should think about. We should hope that we don't have to bear a loss that is too great.

Greatness is not an easy path, it is not a path that is well known. The reason for its unknown nature is that all of us focus on the results. All great men emphasize about the work that goes into it, but we do not see that part. We are dazzled by the glamour. We should remember that the part that is not spoken often enough is the one that is most important. A couple on page in a autobiography, one minute or two in a biopic movie ... That is that part that doesn't look glorious. No one would want to hear about it. We just want to look at the results and be in awe of it.

Now, faced by difficulty, we do not know what to do. Faced by loss, we do not know what to do. We should hope that there is a path, there is a part of the puzzle, there is a past we can relate to in our future. All I want to say that, its okay if we don't have friends, if we don't have a very happening social life, because if you reach success, it will not matter. No one will ask how this phase was and you can ignore it and live in the present of that time. And the number of friends that prop up once you are successful is amazing. It will never make you feel lonely after.

I remember, reading in my history book, that Napoleon was made fun of quite a bit and he nearly cried in the library because they did  not believe he could make it. Napoleon was apparently too short. Yet, he was one of the most influential men in history. To come from a point where everyone makes fun of you, to a point where everyone respects you is a journey that he probably went through friendless or at best with one or two close companions. Yet, we will not see that or think about it when we are faced with difficulties. None of us are exceptions to the rule, we are the rule. We cry at adversity when i should realize that it is a challenge to equate ourselves with great men and women who have been faced with profound sadness in their lives. Indeed, looking at it from this point of view, we should be happy that we have some loss or some reason to be sad. It gives us the opportunity to rise back and prove our worth. Not only to prove to everyone else who has been cynical of our talents but more importantly, to our own minds, for doubts often clouds our minds about our capabilities.

Lastly, I just wanted to say that the passion for success or the passion to become great comes from probably 3 sources (there might be more).

1. Is the passion in itself - when you love something a lot, you are already motivated to work towards it and you do not need a push as such.

2. Is at the face of some misfortune - It is strange that most people who are faced with significant amount of misfortune are the ones that are successful. I think there is something about being in a almost hopeless situation, makes your brain focused. and makes you take "all or nothing" risks because you have nothing much to lose in the first place. I think that is important because that helps one along the steepest curves in the path to achievement.

3. In the face of enmity - there are several occasions when people will come to you and say that you will not make it. At that time, you would want nothing more than to achieve something and scream at their faces. That sometimes drives us to achieving something. It might even feel nice to flaunt your achievement for once in front of them. Yes, this might be considered cheap or insignificant way of doing things. But there will always be people who question your motives and reasons - no matte what you do. A prime example of this rule is Chanakya whose main reason to rise to success and install his disciple as the king was the enmity that he had with the previous king.

There are three more things that are equally important. I think that they are interrelated to each other, but I would try and state in different ways.

1. Peace - one must try and find peace in everything that he does, it might be the most annoying thing in this earth, but still it is important to you. Taking a deep breathe and try relaxing. It will get us through even the worst of situations.

2. Compassion - we must put other people in front of us. It is important when to do it though. You shouldn't do it when you are making important decisions about life. Do it in your day to day activities, that exhibits character and is something that you and the other person will cherish. We should cherish it because making someone else happy makes us happy and that in turn is better than being selfish because there is a little voice within each one of us which tells us that we could have done things better. I think it is only fair that we listen to it at times and get things in better order.

3. Courage - It is one of the most important of human personality traits. Merely having thoughts about godwill or having the desire to do great things is never the only thing required. It takes great amount of courage to overcome that initial inertia. I am talking about that hesitancy that we see when we want to help a stranger in distress. And then we walk away wondering why we did not do it. Courage helps us taking that first step - the first step outside our comfort zone.

Dedicated to Kiran Swami Chandramouli - always alive in my heart. :) <3

Problems the world faces.

-- Intro --

Just a few random thoughts:

Most of my friends and I think that there are two problems that the world is facing (mind you, there are many) but then these are the two basic ones that I think lead to everything else. These being psychological, can bring about a change in every other aspect of everyone else's lives.

-- body --

1) Loss of common sense and the ability of think: I think this is because of the fact that technology has eroded into our lives every single day and that has made us couch potatos of sorts. Think of the last time that you have remember somone's phone number. We even use our cell phones to store a todo list, thereby lessing the use of our memory. Its not just memory, but the fact that we are being fed so much information on the net and otherwise also that it leaves no time for thinking or processing that information. The fact that the quality of internet content cannot be monitored leads to children becoming too mature at too early a stage or that they think they know too much already. Indeed, the next generation might have more information, but I think they will have lesser knowledge.

2) Loss of interaction and loss of human values: Also related to computers but slightly different from the point above. Facebook can be called "social" media, but its not the most social platform. The feeling of having a cup of tea with your friends and just talking and chilling is something that the next generation will miss on. Indeed, in Calcutta, the whole "para" culture is dying down and one part of it can be attributed to the internet. For 10 year old to have facebook accounts and spend 2 hours per day on that, rather than going outside and playing or calling your friends and talking to them will lead to a loss of social values. Pretty soon we would not know how to behave in social situtations and how to communicate verbally because everythign is shifting online these days. Indeed, when schools start teaching how to type and write at the same time, any kid would find it easier to hit keys on the key board than to take a pencil and write.

-- conclusion --

At the end, would like to say that we really do need to re-evaluate technology, computer and the effect of social media. Friends and me using phrases like "y u no" and "my gusta" in every day conversation does have a far reaching consequence and that is something that we need to stay out of. the essence of human beings is being human. That is something that the online world kills if it goes on at this rate.

Lastly, adults however are in a better situation to negate the effects that i;ve said above. That is why, the above post related to minors using computer/internet. That is something we need to look into right now.

The Legacy.

Background:
I was talking to my Grandfather the other day. @82 conversation with him are not easy and i'm the only one that he generally talks properly to. I was asking him about our family tradition of doing Saturday Puja. I have, since 2000 being doing puja to Lord Ayappa under the guidance of my granddad as it was time for me to continue what he had done for nearly 40-50 years. I never did question the existence or the starting of this tradition. Hinduism, the oldest religion of the world supposedly has no starting or ending unlike some other religions (ref. Ganga Somany). Hence i did not ask much about this legacy.

But then yesterday (15th July) when i talked to my grandfather, I got to know that his Great Grandfather used to do the same puja. And this fact he is certain of. Even by the most modest estimates, that makes this legacy around 150 years old. To think that i'm the one continuing this tradition makes me immensly proud and that the 5 generations that have practiced this that now look at me to continue this. 150 years, it took me quite sometime to imagine what that meant. Here are some revelations:

Body:
In a 150 years, heaven and earth has changed. We now live in different times. I dont know if thats a good thing or not, but back then, people had a lot more time to themselves. I can hardly get myself to concentrate and meditate for 15 mins properly, yet i've seen my grandfather do so for 3 hours. Yet, If we merely extrapolate the descent, his elders would have been even more devoted and spent more time praying and in service to God.

On the other hand we, with our computers, cell phones and other such paraphernalia make our lives busy and we seemingly have lesser time for ourselves. I don't say that i'm going to break off from these bonds. But I do think that we should spend more time thinking about ourselves and our world around us, rather than spending the whole day with technology.

That being said, being a part of a 150 year old tradition makes me immensely proud. I think i'm not worthy of this legacy as i'm clearly the weakest link of the chain. Then again, you couldn't blame me, the times are such that anyone in my place too would be in the same predicament.

I have been thinking of late that i should spend a year off from life as such and spend it in service to myself. Probably look for some guru and spend a year under him. Probably in some serene environment so that i can contemplate on thought that have filled me since i know them to exist.

That brings me to think of another thing, will thinking about a lot of things, reduce the entropy of it ? As in, will thinking about everything and anything that strikes my mind, make me most focused or less ? The reason for this being that fact that if I think for a long enough time, I would run out of thoughts to think and that I would eventually repeat the same thoughts over and over again. Thereby focusing my mind.
Or,
will the time spent not thinking about anything in particular help in my mind to focus? Its a debateable topic I think .. not that i'm going to try either of them. But then again, i dont know, i really want to focus my mind, because that seems to be the reason for which i cant have more productive days.

Yet, I do think that i will take my family's name forward. My granddad says that i have the blessings of God. I wouldnt know any better or worse. He and God, seem to have conversations with each other and i get to hear snippet of it, like (what he said near the end of the puja) "God looks happy today, you have done well." Talking about my granddad will take me so maaany posts. (ref. Ananya and Vrinda) and we shall get to that later.

Conclusion:


Written over two days, this post in extremely sporadic and random. Sorry if my thoughts arent as organized as i would like them to be.
please bear with me, i hope i write better next time around.

Peace.

Why the name ?

You could wiki fractals up. It refers to a class of geometry where each part of the figure is a reduced-size copy of the whole. I love it because it gives a sense of the bigger picture and the smaller picture at the same time. Even if you go deeper into my thoughts, you'll find the same pattern and same sequence. You'd find the same if you took a seat back and looked at the bigger picture. The picture in itself is an abstract. There's a want for someone to understand it and hence the blog. Hence the name and hence everything else.


The beauty of fractals is that its singularity holds, no matter what the distance at which you see it. If you understand it at one level. Then there's no need to understand more. Its basically a repetition  that one observes at different levels. My thoughts (i think) are the same. They are for you to decide and understand them at level that suites you.


The stuff i write here is not going to be easy, simple and meant for a coffee time break. But more of the type of things that you want to read when you want to get an insight of someone who has, thought a lot. Its going to be complex, abstract and yet going to make sense, the same way a camera gains its sharpness, once its lens is focused properly.


That's for now.
Peace.