Background:
I was talking to my Grandfather the other day. @82 conversation with him are not easy and i'm the only one that he generally talks properly to. I was asking him about our family tradition of doing Saturday Puja. I have, since 2000 being doing puja to Lord Ayappa under the guidance of my granddad as it was time for me to continue what he had done for nearly 40-50 years. I never did question the existence or the starting of this tradition. Hinduism, the oldest religion of the world supposedly has no starting or ending unlike some other religions (ref. Ganga Somany). Hence i did not ask much about this legacy.
But then yesterday (15th July) when i talked to my grandfather, I got to know that his Great Grandfather used to do the same puja. And this fact he is certain of. Even by the most modest estimates, that makes this legacy around 150 years old. To think that i'm the one continuing this tradition makes me immensly proud and that the 5 generations that have practiced this that now look at me to continue this. 150 years, it took me quite sometime to imagine what that meant. Here are some revelations:
Body:
In a 150 years, heaven and earth has changed. We now live in different times. I dont know if thats a good thing or not, but back then, people had a lot more time to themselves. I can hardly get myself to concentrate and meditate for 15 mins properly, yet i've seen my grandfather do so for 3 hours. Yet, If we merely extrapolate the descent, his elders would have been even more devoted and spent more time praying and in service to God.
On the other hand we, with our computers, cell phones and other such paraphernalia make our lives busy and we seemingly have lesser time for ourselves. I don't say that i'm going to break off from these bonds. But I do think that we should spend more time thinking about ourselves and our world around us, rather than spending the whole day with technology.
That being said, being a part of a 150 year old tradition makes me immensely proud. I think i'm not worthy of this legacy as i'm clearly the weakest link of the chain. Then again, you couldn't blame me, the times are such that anyone in my place too would be in the same predicament.
I have been thinking of late that i should spend a year off from life as such and spend it in service to myself. Probably look for some guru and spend a year under him. Probably in some serene environment so that i can contemplate on thought that have filled me since i know them to exist.
That brings me to think of another thing, will thinking about a lot of things, reduce the entropy of it ? As in, will thinking about everything and anything that strikes my mind, make me most focused or less ? The reason for this being that fact that if I think for a long enough time, I would run out of thoughts to think and that I would eventually repeat the same thoughts over and over again. Thereby focusing my mind.
Or,
will the time spent not thinking about anything in particular help in my mind to focus? Its a debateable topic I think .. not that i'm going to try either of them. But then again, i dont know, i really want to focus my mind, because that seems to be the reason for which i cant have more productive days.
Yet, I do think that i will take my family's name forward. My granddad says that i have the blessings of God. I wouldnt know any better or worse. He and God, seem to have conversations with each other and i get to hear snippet of it, like (what he said near the end of the puja) "God looks happy today, you have done well." Talking about my granddad will take me so maaany posts. (ref. Ananya and Vrinda) and we shall get to that later.
Conclusion:
Written over two days, this post in extremely sporadic and random. Sorry if my thoughts arent as organized as i would like them to be.
please bear with me, i hope i write better next time around.
Peace.
I was talking to my Grandfather the other day. @82 conversation with him are not easy and i'm the only one that he generally talks properly to. I was asking him about our family tradition of doing Saturday Puja. I have, since 2000 being doing puja to Lord Ayappa under the guidance of my granddad as it was time for me to continue what he had done for nearly 40-50 years. I never did question the existence or the starting of this tradition. Hinduism, the oldest religion of the world supposedly has no starting or ending unlike some other religions (ref. Ganga Somany). Hence i did not ask much about this legacy.
But then yesterday (15th July) when i talked to my grandfather, I got to know that his Great Grandfather used to do the same puja. And this fact he is certain of. Even by the most modest estimates, that makes this legacy around 150 years old. To think that i'm the one continuing this tradition makes me immensly proud and that the 5 generations that have practiced this that now look at me to continue this. 150 years, it took me quite sometime to imagine what that meant. Here are some revelations:
Body:
In a 150 years, heaven and earth has changed. We now live in different times. I dont know if thats a good thing or not, but back then, people had a lot more time to themselves. I can hardly get myself to concentrate and meditate for 15 mins properly, yet i've seen my grandfather do so for 3 hours. Yet, If we merely extrapolate the descent, his elders would have been even more devoted and spent more time praying and in service to God.
On the other hand we, with our computers, cell phones and other such paraphernalia make our lives busy and we seemingly have lesser time for ourselves. I don't say that i'm going to break off from these bonds. But I do think that we should spend more time thinking about ourselves and our world around us, rather than spending the whole day with technology.
That being said, being a part of a 150 year old tradition makes me immensely proud. I think i'm not worthy of this legacy as i'm clearly the weakest link of the chain. Then again, you couldn't blame me, the times are such that anyone in my place too would be in the same predicament.
I have been thinking of late that i should spend a year off from life as such and spend it in service to myself. Probably look for some guru and spend a year under him. Probably in some serene environment so that i can contemplate on thought that have filled me since i know them to exist.
That brings me to think of another thing, will thinking about a lot of things, reduce the entropy of it ? As in, will thinking about everything and anything that strikes my mind, make me most focused or less ? The reason for this being that fact that if I think for a long enough time, I would run out of thoughts to think and that I would eventually repeat the same thoughts over and over again. Thereby focusing my mind.
Or,
will the time spent not thinking about anything in particular help in my mind to focus? Its a debateable topic I think .. not that i'm going to try either of them. But then again, i dont know, i really want to focus my mind, because that seems to be the reason for which i cant have more productive days.
Yet, I do think that i will take my family's name forward. My granddad says that i have the blessings of God. I wouldnt know any better or worse. He and God, seem to have conversations with each other and i get to hear snippet of it, like (what he said near the end of the puja) "God looks happy today, you have done well." Talking about my granddad will take me so maaany posts. (ref. Ananya and Vrinda) and we shall get to that later.
Conclusion:
Written over two days, this post in extremely sporadic and random. Sorry if my thoughts arent as organized as i would like them to be.
please bear with me, i hope i write better next time around.
Peace.
